How to Resign: Lessons from Judy Over the last 25 Years of Executive Recruitment
I’ve been a headhunter for a number of years now and I've heard it ALL when it comes to resignation stories. Here's my guide on how to exit your job without creating a workplace scandal (that will be told for years after you're gone):
Do it in person
Unless your boss is a certifiable nightmare, have the decency to resign face-to-face. It shows professionalism and respect. Plus, it’s much harder for them to misinterpret your tone compared to an email that could be read in seventeen different way, none of them flattering.
The Friday resignation myth
"I can only resign on Friday so my boss has the weekend to cool down before I see them again." This logic always makes me laugh. If your boss needs 48 hours of recovery time, Monday morning might actually be MORE awkward. There's no perfect day just rip off the bandaid!
Duck and cover when necessary
Yes, I once had a candidate who had to dodge a flying iPhone during his resignation meeting. The CEO apparently valued expressing his anger more than his $1,200 device. Pro tip: Do a quick scan for potential projectiles before sitting down. And seriously, if you're the boss, throw something replaceable like a stress ball (or better yet, nothing at all).
The Counter-Offer Comedy
One of my candidates resigned only to have her boss launch into what I call "The Desperation Dance." First came shock, then anger, followed by an impromptu salary raise that magically almost doubled her salary on the spot, then the offer for more flexible work hours and finally, I kid you not, “You can work from Spain for six months if that helps.” She asked where this generosity had been during her three years of 70-hour weeks. The lesson? Companies can often find money in the budget somewhere like my emergency chocolate stash hidden until absolutely necessary.
The Non-Resignation Resignation
I once had a candidate who tried the "soft resignation" approach. He hinted for weeks with comments like "I'm starting to explore my options" and "I've been thinking about my career path lately." When he finally worked up the courage to actually resign, his boss looked genuinely shocked and said, "But you've always seemed so happy here!" Clear communication matters, people.
The Boomerang Effect
A VP candidate of mine resigned from her position only to have her resignation rejected. Yes, rejected. Her CEO simply said, "No, I don't accept that" and walked out of the room. She ended up writing a formal letter and placing it on his desk. Two years later, the company recruited her back at a much higher salary. The CEO's first words? "See, I told you that resignation wouldn't stick." I really like that one.
Waterworks won't help
I've seen tears from both sides of the desk, and it never makes things easier. Whether it's a boss feeling betrayed or an employee overwhelmed with guilt, crying just makes an already uncomfortable situation even more awkward. Keep tissues nearby just in case, but aim for composed and professional.
Mind the bridge
Remember that the person you're resigning to might be a future reference. Even if your boss's leadership style makes Darth Vader look warm and fuzzy, resist the urge to provide that feedback during your exit. Save the brutally honest assessment for your private group chat. The professional world is smaller than you think!